Business, Careers

The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where bokeh I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that bokeh I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for porn caterwauling) to the receptionist the porn next morning, bokeh she rolled her eyes and porn declared crot the woman an ‘actrice’, bokep or bokep sex worker.

Now, crot bokeh according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokep it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokep all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, memek you can’t measure crot passion in terms of decibels: crot there’s sex as performance art, memek and crot sex as genuine intimacy. And bokeh when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokep trusts her partner and porn is not fearing for bokeh a fragile male ego, crot she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokep moan than shriek like the crot rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokeh female contributors regularly confessed to faking bokeh orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, bokeh they’d explain, crot so they could make their partner feel happy, memek while conserving their energy for bokep other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two bokep memek memek researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that crot erotic decibels were all about manners and memek ‘manipulation’, memek and bokep that women were prone to what crot they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, bokep so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: porn crot memek ‘I’m enjoying this, crot but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ memek Sound familiar, bokep ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes porn from porn, memek where loud always equals better.

As a woman bokeh from Sunderland crot said in 2014 after crot neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: porn ‘As far as I’m concerned, crot that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokeh only if you bokep want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, crot Sex At Dawn, bokeh Christopher Ryan and crot Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our crot nearest primate memek cousins – was to alert porn nearby males that they were fertile and bokep keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokep I can understand bokep the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokeh then men should take heed: memek the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris