Arts & Entertainment, Celebrities

The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter bokeh where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly bokep that I wondered if I should bokeh offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for memek caterwauling) memek to the receptionist the next morning, bokeh she rolled her eyes and porn declared the woman an ‘actrice’, bokeh or porn sex worker.

Now, memek according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokeh bokep crot all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, bokeh you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: porn there’s sex as performance art, crot and porn sex as genuine intimacy. bokep And bokeh when a woman is genuinely aroused, crot trusts her partner and bokep is not fearing for bokep a crot fragile male ego, memek she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokeh moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokep female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, porn they’d explain, crot so they could make their partner feel happy, bokep while conserving their energy for bokeh other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another crot study by two researchers from the porn University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and bokeh ‘manipulation’, crot and memek that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to bokeh encourage their partners over the finishing line, bokep so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, crot the crot greater the chance the orgasm is being porn faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: porn ‘I’m enjoying this, memek but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, bokeh ladies?

The only other reason memek to screech like a bokeh demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, crot where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland bokeh said in 2014 after neighbours bokep complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: memek ‘As far as I’m concerned, crot that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, memek only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In porn their book, bokeh Sex At Dawn, bokeh Christopher Ryan and porn Cacilda Jetha concluded porn the most likely bokeh reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile crot and bokep keen to crot copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, memek I can understand porn the need to advertise. But if you’re not, crot then men should take heed: memek the best sex may just be bokeh the quietest.

Paris